Friendship and Life

[Ryuken]

So i've been thinking. I don't have any good friends or what most people would call a" life" I would go home after school everyday and just download TV shows from Hong Kong, Japan(with sub) and American ones and after i'm done with them i do my homework then play games that's basically all I do everyday. I school i talk to people in class and lunch but after school i have nothing to do. I think i lack social skills since i never have topics that i can talk about with people, I'm just an overall not interesting person. And almost everyone one i know from school just wants to party on the weekend and get drunk/high/"have fun" and I'm not into any of those things. Sometimes i think i make up too many excuses on not having friends when i don't try to make any. so any suggestions on how to improve my social life? btw plz don't bash this since my self-esteem is already pretty low but don't worry, it's not low enough that i would kill myself so u can still poke fun if u want

[Weirdy]

how 'bout myspace?

[L.S.D]

First of all, you need to tell us your age. Different age bracket has different advices. Of course, your environment will affect and shape you too so my advices might not worked since I am in Malaysia.

 

You need to tell:

- are you the only Asian kid around your area? how about in school?

- did you mix with other Asian kids?

- did you mix with other ethnic groups?

[JKKDARK]

So i've been thinking. I don't have any good friends or what most people would call a" life" I would go home after school everyday and just download TV shows from Hong Kong, Japan(with sub) and American ones and after i'm done with them i do my homework then play games that's basically all I do everyday. I school i talk to people in class and lunch but after school i have nothing to do. I think i lack social skills since i never have topics that i can talk about with people, I'm just an overall not interesting person. And almost everyone one i know from school just wants to party on the weekend and get drunk/high/"have fun" and I'm not into any of those things. Sometimes i think i make up too many excuses on not having friends when i don't try to make any. so any suggestions on how to improve my social life? btw plz don't bash this since my self-esteem is already pretty low but don't worry, it's not low enough that i would kill myself so u can still poke fun if u want

Why you don't like to party? That's the main problem.

[L.S.D]

So i've been thinking. I don't have any good friends or what most people would call a" life" I would go home after school everyday and just download TV shows from Hong Kong, Japan(with sub) and American ones and after i'm done with them i do my homework then play games that's basically all I do everyday. I school i talk to people in class and lunch but after school i have nothing to do. I think i lack social skills since i never have topics that i can talk about with people, I'm just an overall not interesting person. And almost everyone one i know from school just wants to party on the weekend and get drunk/high/"have fun" and I'm not into any of those things. Sometimes i think i make up too many excuses on not having friends when i don't try to make any. so any suggestions on how to improve my social life? btw plz don't bash this since my self-esteem is already pretty low but don't worry, it's not low enough that i would kill myself so u can still poke fun if u want

Why you don't like to party? That's the main problem.

Not everyone like to party. i don't like to party either. I also like to play games and I don't have many friends. So, I kinda can relate to him. Still, not enough info to make a good advice.

[Sybarite Paladin AxL]

Ethnicity shouldn't have anything to do with it.

 

My advice to you brother is to find some other hobbies. Practice a sport, learn to skate/snowboard, find something great to listen to. Get a more eye-catching clothing style. Oh and most of all, get some principles to guide your life. Like being a good person, helping those in need, listening to other people's problems. Try to make some good, long-lasting friendships with people. Be honest, smile always, look on the bright side of life. If you like an instrument, learn it and play it.

 

You say you're not into partying but I'm completely sure if you were to attend some on a regular basis you'd enjoy them a lot. There's plenty of people out there who would love to be your friends.

 

Oh and remember this especially. Only you can provide a reason for your life. Me, I have embraced Paladin teachings and I will live through the happiness of others, which inadvertently reflects on myself. I will accept no half-measures. I will take care of my loved ones and friends.

[JKKDARK]

So i've been thinking. I don't have any good friends or what most people would call a" life" I would go home after school everyday and just download TV shows from Hong Kong, Japan(with sub) and American ones and after i'm done with them i do my homework then play games that's basically all I do everyday. I school i talk to people in class and lunch but after school i have nothing to do. I think i lack social skills since i never have topics that i can talk about with people, I'm just an overall not interesting person. And almost everyone one i know from school just wants to party on the weekend and get drunk/high/"have fun" and I'm not into any of those things. Sometimes i think i make up too many excuses on not having friends when i don't try to make any. so any suggestions on how to improve my social life? btw plz don't bash this since my self-esteem is already pretty low but don't worry, it's not low enough that i would kill myself so u can still poke fun if u want

Why you don't like to party? That's the main problem.

Not everyone like to party. i don't like to party either. I also like to play games and I don't have many friends. So, I kinda can relate to him. Still, not enough info to make a good advice.

Are you a very shy person? What's scaring you from going to night clubs?

[L.S.D]

I don't like the noise, the stuffy environment, the smoke etc etc. I enjoy going to pubs with nice music, but that about it.

[Fatal Rose]

Ryuken

 

 

My honest advice, casually get closer to one or some people at school, eventually work your way up to asking "hey man, what do you and the guys usually do when you guys hang out?" after he tells you, reply with this "I would not mind handing too man, just not into smoking or drinking or anything like that." Most likely no one will care and they will invite you to hang out.

 

I used to never drink or smoke anything in high school and I used to go to hang out with all types of people into all types of things all the time. Never was a problem.

[Ryuken]

I' m 17. not the only Asian kid around but the only not born in the US so i guess cultural differences have an effect on me. People asked me to go to parties before but i don't like going so they stop asking.

 

Anyway do u guys think friendship is important in life? And is it really needed to function properly? btw thx for the advises so far

[Fatal Rose]

I' m 17. not the only Asian kid around but the only not born in the US so i guess cultural differences have an effect on me. People asked me to go to parties before but i don't like going so they stop asking.

 

Anyway do u guys think friendship is important in life? And is it really needed to function properly? btw thx for the advises so far

 

Relationships of any kind in life are very important. Loneliness is not something you want to grow comfortable with.

[Devia Eleven]

So i've been thinking. I don't have any good friends or what most people would call a" life" I would go home after school everyday and just download TV shows from Hong Kong, Japan(with sub) and American ones and after i'm done with them i do my homework then play games that's basically all I do everyday. I school i talk to people in class and lunch but after school i have nothing to do. I think i lack social skills since i never have topics that i can talk about with people, I'm just an overall not interesting person. And almost everyone one i know from school just wants to party on the weekend and get drunk/high/"have fun" and I'm not into any of those things. Sometimes i think i make up too many excuses on not having friends when i don't try to make any. so any suggestions on how to improve my social life? btw plz don't bash this since my self-esteem is already pretty low but don't worry, it's not low enough that i would kill myself so u can still poke fun if u want

 

This is the exact case for me except for the Asian part, and I'm not joking.

[L.S.D]

Ok, not born in US and grow up there might be a cultural problem. I know that most Asian kids do not like to go partying. They prefer the mangas, comics, games etc etc

 

But seriously, Fatal is giving good advices here. You can try to join the crowd and hang out with them. but this could be very tough.

 

I also have tough time belnding into the crowd. i always stand out among them (being tall not helping) and have "weird" hobbies (like to draw cartoons, play games when the others are busy partying, tackling girls, or just hanging out). And thagt is during school era. But I did changed when i go to the university. Open up my eyes and mind more and mix with more people (even if they are only from my own race). I ended up doing not so well in my study but brush my social skills and i never regret till this day.

It might be too soon to tell you to try and mix with the crowds and everything. i would say, stay being yourself as long as you are happy. if you are not, join groups or churches that promotes group activities. being more active will help too. This really need a self-push from yourself.

 

BTW, i also like reading when young besides games, so you cna always hang out in the library. You never know, you might hit with the right people there

 

Partying and drinking is not for everyone so find your own niche group (i am lucky i have found a group who likes to play games here, besides doing "karaoke-ing" )

[Smilee]

I assume you guys are in high school right? Basically this is what I pretty much did up until sophomore year. I went home and did stuff by myself and whatnot. Come junior year I started getting into other hobbies, sports, and clubs. As a result I met a lot more people with similar interests and I began to develop more "real" friends over the year. Sure we'd go to my house and play video games and other stuff, but doing these activities with friends is what sets it apart from doing stuff by yourself. Highschool pretty much sucked, but hanging out with other kids every other day was the redeeming factor. Once you get into college you'll be with friends pretty much every time you are free.

[Ryuken]

Let's hope that college life will be better, o did i mention that i'm only 5'5 so everyone is like taller than me and me face break out easily i guess i should spend more of my time studying and live a better life in the 30's-40s