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Good Comebacks for Your Telemarketer!!

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21 replies to this topic

#12
Gryph

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actually i did this to a jehova's witness once when i saw them comming up my building from the window, i knew they were comming to me since i was the only non jehova in the building.


so me and my buds quickly put on some black metal, and we smear our faces with black crud, and grab a pair of knifes.

*knock knock knock*
*i open the door and my friend has the knife to my neck*
witnesses:*shocked* uh, um, eh....
me: are you the sacrifice we've been waiting for? Hurry Lord Lucifer awaits.

they never came back.

GAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA! That's brilliant!

#13
Rag

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MWhaahahah I love it when you know they're coming. Then you just plan something and have tons of fun hahahaha :lol:

#14
-VIOLENCE-

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the "TELEZAPPER"

doesn't even work :blink:

wasted 19.99 $ for that

#15
Gryph

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Yeah that thing was definitely a scam. But this Do Not Call list thing works. We haven't gotten a telemarketing call since it went into effect.

#16
Captain FuKu

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I don't bother with them. They always seem to call at the worst times, such as when I'm taking a nap. I just hang up and pull the plug for good measure.

#17
Weirdy

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I hated it when they'd wake me up in the morning last year when I was suspended from school. It was at the same fuken time...9a.m

#18
AntiWinner22

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I have personally done this, and the reactions are COMEDICAL!!!:

Wait until the telemarketer gets to the main offer or whatever, then ask him why is it such a good deal. If they respond, then reply "I'll tell you why, because your company gets blood-money and makes little Taiwanese kids smoke crack to get good deals, that's why!" or "I'll tell you why, because you touch yourself at night."

Have fun. Anon.

#19
Gryph

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Now I wish the Do Not Call thing wasn't so effective so I could use some of these lines on those people.

#20
random guy

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I found one which CKY did, where a chick called this dude up to sell him a newspaper subscription, and he pretended he had just been perscribed inhalation anthrax, and tried to get the girl to write up his obituary for him.

#21
Vermillion

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I used to set my answering machine up to send out that Special Information Tone (SIT) so that the other end would disconnect. It worked quite effectively and I had no telemarketing calls for months.

The problem with answering is that their machine records it as someone or something picked up, so it adds it to a list to call again later. Using SIT, their machines recorded my number as a Disconnected Number and added my phone number to a Do Not Call list for a couple months or so.

Pretty fun concept, except you have to screen your calls. Obviously this isn't as effective as it used to be, but it'll probably still work on those systems which haven't upgraded yet.

All you have to do is record the Special Information Tone on your answering machine before you record your real message and you're all set.

More info about SIT is here: http://privatecitizen.com/sit.html

I'm unfortunately too nice to chew out telemarketers. Now if they keep badgering me on the phone, then that's another story... :lol:

#22
lacien

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One time I hung up on one, and he actually called back saying something like "oh, we must have gotten disconnected..now where were we..?" I was actually in the middle of something with a girl over, so needless to say I was very rude in my reply.
In another recent event, one called my mom and actually yelled at her because my mother wouldn't give the telemarketer her checking account and routing numbers. This one called once a day for about a week or so.




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